Breath and Thoughts

We breath our thoughts. In breath are our thoughts, out breath are the manifestation of those thoughts, in our expressions, voice etc. When our in breath are full of loving, exciting and positive thoughts, speak on that feeling, our voice will be full of excitement.
Underneath all of our outward differences, we are all human, always appeal to our sameness, or humanness. Don’t take yourself so seriously. Be good at what you do and always be good to people.

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Beauty Tips

Always wear sunscreen before heading out.

Don’t drink, don’t smoke, don’t have caffeine. That will wreck your skin as you get older.

Limit sugar and dairy intake, they cause inflammation.

Eat lots of green vegetables, asparagus, brussel sprouts, broccoli and kale.

How you feel inside and who you are inside kind of shows on your face.

For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others, for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness, and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone.

Mediate 10 -20 minutes a day, get at least 8 hours of sleep.

Best Parenting Tips

I like to do research to find the best formula to do the things I need to do.  The very important job I have at the moment is to parent a toddler.  After talking to numerous parents, googling the internet, reading books, combine with personal experience, I compile a list of things we parents must remember when we are parenting our child.

  • We need to help boost our child’s self-esteem.  Kids, especially young kids see themselves through their parents’ eyes.  Our tone of voice, body language, and every expression are absorbed by our kids.  our words and actions affect their self-esteem more than anything else.  Choose words carefully and be compassionate, no belittling comments or comparing our child unfavorably with others.
  • Catch them being good, make a point of finding something to praise every day.
  • Be consistent with your discipline.  The goal of discipline is to help our kids choose acceptable behaviors and learn self-control and be responsible.  I usually do one warning, followed by consequences like a time out or loss of privileges.  Don’t make the mistake I made initially, time out for throwing fit one day and ignoring the next day will not work.
  • Model the traits you wish to see in your kids and treat them the way we wish others to treat us.  Our kids learn a lot about how to act by watching us.
  • Explain things to them.  Kids want and deserve explanations as much as adults do.  If we don’t take time to explain, kids will begin to wonder about our values and motives and whether they have any basis.  Parents who reason with their kids allow them to understand and learn in a nonjudgmental way.  If there is a problem, describe it, express your feelings, and invite your child to work on a solution with you.  Kids who participate in decisions are more motivated to carry them out.
  • Accept our their personalities now.  If your kid is an introvert now, chances are he or she will be an introvert 5 or even 10 years from now.  Our kids are given to us with their own innate personalities.  Encourage to be more of their strengths, not focusing on their weaknesses.
  • Don’t bribe.  The best reward for a kids is time with the parents.  We have to be clear about our own values.  Our kids watch us closely.  If you want your kids to be able to stand up for their values, you have to do the same.   One of the most important things we do for our kids is to present them with a version of adult life that is appealing and worth striving for.
  • Be authoritative, be in control but with a warm attitude.
  • Model a healthy lifestyle and good habits, such as regular exercise and proper nutrition, for our kids
  • Support spiritual or religious development and participate in spiritual or religious activities
  • Take precautions to protect your child and maintain awareness of the child’s activities and friends.

If we can keep these in mind and practice them often, I believe we will be on our way to building a strong, lifelong relationship with our children.  Happy parenting!

 

Manager’s Checklist for Effective Employee Check-Ins

Before the meeting:

  • Review notes from the last meeting on any items that need to be followed up on
  • Review the employee’s list of goals and projects to see if there are any due or running off course
  • Make a note of important company changes that need to be discussed with the employee
  • Review any feedback sent/received any discussion points

During the meeting:

  • Get the employee talking
    • use conversation starters to engage the employee in conversation
    • use open-ended questions to keep them talking
    • let the employee steer the conversation but make sure you discuss any important items
  • Goal/Project Updates
    • discuss the status of short-term goals and long-term projects
    • adjust/update existing goals with the employee
    • discuss any challenges or lessons learned
    • offer coaching and/or assistance for any roadblocks
    • discuss if any other priorities might affect the goal progress
    • ensure all goals are still on track
    • acknowledge any milestones or accomplishments
    • discuss/confirm any new goals for the employee
  • Recent accomplishments
    • acknowledge recent accomplishments and provide feedback
    • ask the employee for any recent accomplishments
  • Status of training/learning
    • discuss any training items due/in progress
    • ask the employee if there are any training requests
    • ask if the employee feels they are getting enough feedback
    • ask if the employee is learning from peers/mentors or if they would like to
    • recommend training items to improve skills and further career
    • discuss how training should be executed
  • Company or team updates/news
    • discuss any important company/team updates or news
    • confirm any action items needed
  • Employee ideas/Requests for change
    • Ask the employee for any ideas/input
    • discuss any areas in need of change (company, team, project, assignment etc)
    • ask the employee if your management style is effective for them and get suggestions for change
    • discuss any overall roadblocks or distractions that might be affecting the employee
  • Employee Career Development
    • discuss employee’s career goals
    • discuss how you can work together to achieve their career goals
    • discuss opportunities and career paths for the employee
    • set clear expectations for any lateral/upward movement
  • plan for the Week/Month/Quarter
    • review the priorities for the short and long-term

End of the meeting:  summarize

After the meeting: document

Overall, frequent check-ins with employees is a must to ensure clarity, provide coaching, and offer the support needed for an employee to succeed.

Meetings with Your Boss

These are the things I’ve gathered over the years in how to more wisely use meeting times with any boss-
– Use the time to learn about each other, the challenges faced by your team
– Do not just cover status, you can do it easily with a bulleted summary, most of the time, the boss is not going to know what you are talking about as they are not following every step of the things you do or they might not be important to them
– Share at least one success. Bosses hear about complaints all the time, they would appreciate a break from staff’s venting
– Present your idea and get your boss’ reaction

Life’s Decisions

Thinking back some of the important decisions i made in life, my reactions now were “why had I done that”.  Needless to say I had my fair share of mistake and regrets.  Important decisions to me are the ones that are not easily reversible, such choosing a place to settle down, a career path, a life partner or a decision that will have a huge impact on your reputation, I have my fair shares of mistake and regrets.

I came across with an article on Huffingtonpost.com which provides a nice formula to making better decisions. Here’s the link to the article –  http://www.huffingtonpost.com/elizabeth-rider/how-to-make-better-lifech_b_6662064.html

I was instantly intrigued because I am always on the lookout for formula on highly uncertain processes to reduce the uncertainty in those processes.  The decision making process made top of the list.  The formula is called the 10-10-10 rule.  It requires that you evaluate how you feel in 10 minutes, 10 months and 10 years when facing difficult choices.  The key is to focus on how you want to feel in the long run when making decision.  It points out two main factors in making bad decision.  First is our need for instant gratification, secondly our fear of the unknown.  For some of us, the need to go for that cheeseburger is due to the need for instant gratification, we are not thinking that in the long run bad food choices will bring all kinds of health issues.  When in doubt, most of us would choose to do nothing because that would be the safest thing to do.  Who knows whether or not you will be successful or better off if you change career.

I am debating whether or not to stay at my current job at the moment.  I am aching to do something different and yet cannot let go of the comfort of having a stable paycheck. I thought about the author’s suggestions, I will add that trusting yourself is another factor in this formula.  I am not quite there yet…..   My decision now is to sleep on it until the end of the year.